Boundaries Baby

Time for some border control in life.

You know roughly where the lines is in various areas of your life, right? But would heads of countries be okay just kind of knowing where their border lines were? If they were just roughly drawn?

HECK NO.

It’s time that we start valuing our time, ourselves, our lives enough to but up some strict border control. Here are some categories to start with:

1) OTHERS CANNOT:

2) I HAVE THE RIGHT TO ASK FOR:

3) TO VALUE MYSELF & MY TIME, I CAN :

If you have a workout scheduled that is a part of your intentional “having it all” and a moms group invites your to brunch at the same time the day before, it’s okay to say you have an appointment.

I could give 1,000 examples of ways that sometimes we just allow others to determine the course of our days. We’ve got to keep strong against compromise or it will become constant and your intention setting we talked about on Monday was a royal waste of time. There’s no point in setting intentions if you are going to let anything and anyone push that of course.

It may seem like a little thing, and it’s only once, but then it’s twice and twenty times and three months pass and you’ve made no progress in any goals that you’ve set, and you’re not at all living the life that you set out to live, and you definitely don’t feel like you have it all.

Do it yourself chronic over achievers (like myself) want to crush any commitment they’ve made, but they make too many. Taking on more and more, and there comes a point when too many YES’S will crush you or dilute everything you’re doing.

Say the right no’s so you can say the right YES’s.

TIPS TO SAY NO.

Use an active voice: “I can or can’t” rather than “ I would or I might.” Use a 5 sentence rule. You don’t have to go on and on forever.

Thank you Sandwich: Be appreciative of invitations and opportunities, state what you are alternatively focusing on right now, and end with a suggestion for something that may work in the future, or if you want nothing to do with the invitation or opportunity, offer something of value, an idea contribution, a referral, or a compliment. And then be thankful again.

Gab union once said, I swear the second I learned to say no, that was the best anti-aging I could do for myself.

XOXO

Ash